Press your spaceface close to mine

Motivational Speaker

Posted by Sunday on Sep 18, 2008 at 12:01 pm in Movies

First, a confession: I like Keanu Reeves.

And I’d like to say I’m no fangirl that would fall all over herself trying to touch his jacket should I see him casually trying to be casual while entering some LA eatery, we all know that isn’t true.  I’d probably shriek “I loved you in The Matrix!!!” at him — which is an honest lie — and swoon.

Defense of liking Keanu: he seems like the kind of person I’d like despite their fame.  And I mean that in the least ironic, least winky-winky way possible.  He’s a private person, which I can appreciate, and seems not to give much of a shit about being some bulked-up heartthrob with an actress trophy-girlfriend.  Blah blah blah.  Anyway, my point:  he’s hosting a showing of The Matrix and LA’s beloved Arclight theater, something that piqued my interest despite wanting to punch The Matrix in the nuts. I do adore a roomful of excited nerds, even if it means viewing the singlemost overrated film in history.  And I do adore Mr. Reeves.

Alas, there is a scandal afoot.  The Arclight apparently presold tickets to AFI members and then, as many fans have whined, opened their boxoffice at least an hour before they said they would.  Result: tickets totally sold out before they went on sale.  My disappointment and indignation over this was suddenly overwhelmed by a single memory:

I don’t actually want to watch The Matrix again.  Very little can make me want to see it again.  The second and third movies I saw only in the theater and can’t even justify wasting Netflix time on.  How can I dislike these movies so much and still like Reeves?

I’m just a complicated person, I guess.

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September 18th, 2008 | Movies

2 Responses to “Motivational Speaker”

  1. NYPinTA Says:

    Because Keanu is pretty. And that he doesn’t have a trophy wife and livin’ la vida loca in LA and generally making an ass of himself.
    BTW The Matrix rocked. Until it didn’t.

  2. Sunday Says:

    The Matrix is one of those movies that make me wish I’d seen it as a person who hadn’t seen a lot of science fiction before, you know what I mean? I wish I could have temporarily removed any memory of scifi… and, logic, I guess… and just enjoyed it for what it was. Instead it was 2 hours of going, “Wait, that’s from a Peter F. Hamilton novel – and that’s from a William Gibson novel – and that’s from an Iain Banks novel,” et cetera et cetera. And it wasn’t that they did a great job of using all these ideas, they did a really half-ass job – you HAVE to do a half-ass job when you’re working with a dozen independent scifi tropes in one film. I’ve written big diatribes on The Matrix before, but they generally all say: I just wish someone else had done it. Someone with a little more restraint.

    The other problem I had was that it felt really stale to me, and not just because the great days of cyberpunk are behind us (for the record, I think more and more cyberpunk is going to make its way into the theaters over the next decade – cinema is always 10-20 years behind literature), but because the my high school days were surprisingly like the movie. A few less machines, I guess. Joking aside, we were totally cyberpunk. I had spiky pink or green or blue hair and wore a black trench coat and mirrored sunglasses. I was SO DORKY. Oh my god I love myself. Anyway, we would try and hack the local BBSs and make “boxes” to phreak with (that never worked) and thought that we were going to get carted away for having copies of The Anarchist’s Cookbook stored on 3.5 floppies hidden in air vents in our parents houses. Spent plenty of time convincing my dad to drive me to Seattle to buy some knee-high bad-ass lace-up boots (impossible to find at the time, now of course available in any American mall) and settled for the more sensible calf-high (thanks dad!).


    My point being: suddenly all the vinyl and trench coats and sunglasses on the big screen made me tisk and be all, “Bitches, we did that 10 years ago.”

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